Mukilteo Musings

Seattleites are NOT Friendly

This was the gist of an editorial today in the Seattle PI by Bill Radke and my family's breakfast table discussion. (seattlepi.com) As I blogged previously, the U.S. Census Bureau called Seattle America's Most Educated city. This designation prompted some nasty letters to the editor from Midwesterners who have moved here claiming we may be smart but we are snobby, pretentious, and tactless. Perhaps it is the weather and we walk around with our lattes which are nothing more than adult portable baby bottles, the article says. We are introverted and the grayness causes us to disappear inside ourselves. We do not want to acknowledge or look at people or God forbid, get involved in a conversation.

I admit it and I totally agree. I never really thought about it much until we went to Nashville two years ago. When shopping in a mall, unbelievably perky store clerks would approach us, calling us "Hun" and acting like we were long lost family--friendliness dripping over us like honey. "AAAHH", I'd think to myself and back up a few steps. Every store was like that; it was scary. I wanted to scream, "Hey, I'm from Seattle; I have this bubble around me and do not invade my space or be too friendly unless a. you are really my family or b. a very close friend or c. that friendliness is truly sincere! And PLEASE DON'T TOUCH!"

The article did not have a good reason for why we are like this. My husband asked, "Then why are we such polite and friendly drivers? We never honk. The 'finger' is usually the index finger signaling to allow a car to turn or move in front of us--with a corresponding thank you wave--clearly well-known Seattle behavior."

"This is true," I responded. "But when we are in our cars (our bubbles), there is no chance of having to get involved in a conversation so we can be polite!"

My daughter piped in, "And besides, it is all an effort to avoid an accident. Otherwise, we'd have to get out of the car a talk to the people who ran into us."

Two years ago we also went to New York City. I really liked the people there and felt much more friendliness than Seattle but it was sincere and helpful. My daughter and I were in a buffet-type lunch line in Manhattan to get a fabulous salad. Most of the patrons appeared to be regulars. I wasn't quite sure whether or not to order a half-salad. A person in line overheard and told me exactly what to do in a straight forward not too friendly but helpful way. I was very appreciative. In Seattle, the people in line would say nothing, scowl, wonder why I was holding up the line, and conclude I was some idiot from out of town who didn't know how things work around here.

The editorial in today's paper states that on hiking trails, people's friendliness blossoms. I disagree--completely. Hikers I have encountered barely acknowledge anyone else. Everyone is thinking the same thing, "Damn, this is my trail and I am not willing to share; let's walk faster (or slower) so we don't have to be around these folks."

The final suggestion of the article, "All around you are Homo sapiens [in downtown Seattle] and they are just as much a part of nature as the eagles. They're a little skittish and don't like to be petted until they're familiar with you. But they do understand a smile and a nod. Give them a little of what they want. It can't hurt. And they might amaze you."