Mukilteo Musings

Character

Character is defined as the combination of emotional, intellectual, and moral qualities that distinguishes a person. An expression of good character happens out of the soul of a person; it cannot be planned. When it happens, the person from whom the character shines usually is completely unaware. As a Mom, I have no advice or secrets to give. I think I lucked out but my children have good character and I thank God everyday for the blessings who are my children.

Last night, my daughter and I were discussing travel opportunies offered through school to Central and South America for humanitarian purposes. Kaley said one of the girls at school who happens to be a cheerleader said, "Oh, I wanna go! I wanna help poor people!" My 16 year old daughter emphasized to me that this was the wrong attitude. She believed the girl was approaching the subject by assuming she was better than those she would help. My wise child explained that to truly be helpful, we must assume we are equal with others in the world and realize we are sharing.

My son spent a month in Guatemala last spring. The travel was through his university and he received college credit but he went to satisfy his insatiable thirst to learn everything about the world. The object was to learn about the culture, people, languages and politics of the country and the class traveled throughout all of Guatemala. After two weeks of travel, he settled in with a family to spend two weeks immersed in Spanish. He loved the children everywhere he went. He told me he would squat down to eye level and speak Spanish with them realizing speaking with children is a wonderful way to hone language skills.

Guatemalan children



Lucas had the opportunity to help with building stoves. My son was deeply moved by the overwhelming poverty he saw; teen agers from Mukilteo, WA aren't used to seeing hillsides covered with shacks and open sewers in dirt paths between the rows of metal sided boxes. He learned that the health of these beautiful children can be improved if fireplaces can be built within their houses with a chimney--a simple chimney--to vent the smoke and particulates out the top as opposed to living with an open wood fire. As my son explained all of this in a phone call, I sensed some frustration. At first, he was on the roof trying to hammer flashing to hold stovepipe; he felt he couldn't do it well so he switched to laying bricks with cement inside; he couldn't keep the bricks straight so he resorted to mixing the cement outside the shack. He said he'll never be able to do what he wants with his life in countries like this if he can't swing a hammer. He said, sadly, he wasn't very helpful.

Lucas helping to build stoves


Of course, the American college students had an audience. Lucas was particularly interested in one boy, about 13, who wanted to learn English. My son described this boy as very smart and curious and he enjoyed teaching him English words. At 18, Lucas was the youngest of the group of Americans and feeling frustrated with the building process took a break to kick a soccer ball around in the adjacent lot with the Guatemalan boys. The game attracted even more kids from the neighborhood. He related to me how good these kids are at playing soccer. The kids loved it! Lucas was amazed at how the children were overjoyed simply speaking with him or merely kicking around a soccer ball or learning a few words of English.

"Lucas, don't you see??" I attempted to point out to him.

"See what? That I'm totally worthless at building anything? Dad really needs to teach me to build stuff!"

His character was blinding me but he couldn't see it. He couldn't see how fabulous it was for Guatemalan children to be respected, acknowledged, and valued by an American teenager. He couldn't see how significant it was that he liked talking to them and interacting with them. He couldn't see his impact on those children. He couldn't see anything special.

He couldn't see how helpful he truly was!