Mukilteo Musings

How do I Feel?

Yesterday, I felt pretty good in the afternoon. Lucas came home to eat lunch with me during his noon break. I had two friends pay a delightful visit to me and I walked Apolo. Apolo was not a good dog when he decided to drag me across the street to stake his claim to the neighborhood over two dogs being nicely walked by their owner. I can no longer restrain him because I am not as strong as I used to be and do not weigh enough. The episode exhausted me.

Today, perhaps because I had a full day yesterday, I am not feeling great. The last two cycles of chemo have left me with numbness in my feet and my tongue. My hands are tingly as well. The scary thing is my oncologist told me that cold related neuropathies will diappear after chemo but other types of numbness may not. I am hoping that my body will regenerate this loss of feeling because it is annoying. I realize the neuropathy will not kill me but when I have trouble eating because of appetite, a numb tongue does not help. Also, I feel kind of rag doll tired. It is a struggle to be positive and hopeful when the cumulative effects of the chemo are getting to me.

Monday will be chemo #11 with only one more after that. Just the thought of one more chemo after Monday is spirit lifting, I must say. And I have to keep my mind on the fact that good chunks of the day, I am doing well.

Our weather has been rainy the last few days but at the moment, it is simply cloudy. I thought I'd take a picture of the disappearing leaves in Big Gulch behind our house. Compare the photo to the same shot in my post below. Our view expands without leaves from November to April.


Disappearing Leaves!